The big decision

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From the beginning me and my husband have wanted to adopt a child. We decided we would have our first child naturally then we would adopt our second child in our early thirties. We started trying for a baby a year and a half ago, with no luck. Frustration and sadness is what we sat with every month when we saw a negative pregnancy test. We both went for tests and to add to our frustration, we are both 100% fine, no problems!!  Here we are trying for a baby, we are young, we are healthy we are financially stable but yet we cant have the one thing we want. Frustrating to the max! Worst part is seeing others get pregnant..and when you are trying…EVERYONE is getting pregnant except you. So we revisited the idea of adopting, maybe if we adopt first, we can try again in 3 years for another baby.

I must say, I was 50/50 on the fact that we were going to do this so soon. Although i was 100% sure I  wanted to adopt, I wasnt sure I wanted to do it now. The horror stories I have heard about waiting years and years to be placed, what if we applied and waited 5 years with no luck,  I would be well in my thirties and then still to try for another…not happening. We made an appointment with an adoption agency in Paarl for Monday the 10th October.  

We met with a lovely social worker who herself had adopted a son 14 years ago. Someone who knew what we were feeling and it made me feel very relaxed speaking to her knowing shes been in my shoes. Me and my husband did not have to ask any questions she was so clued up she told us every single detail of the process and when we left there that afternoon, any doubts in my mind were erased gone. If anything, I dont think I want any natural children anymore.

The social worker said (which i really liked) A mother giving up her child for adoption is NOT a bad mother, a bad mother will never do that. A mother giving her child up is a woman who realises she cannot provide the best possible life for her unborn child and carries that child out of love to give to someone who can.

She sent us  home with a stack of documents to fill in, the requirements are  references, a letter from  your doctor saying you are in good health as well as payslips, you also need to apply for police clearance to check if you are not a criminal or child sex offender.  

They received our documentation on the 17th October, so now we can just wait for them to contact our references and then we will get a house visit. Ok so, we are now waiting for the emails to go out to our references…will keep this blog updated on the process…

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4 responses »

  1. Where would one start 2 look in order to get the ball rolling.. What adoption agency did you use? Don’t know where to look just to get the documentation needed!!
    So glad ur dreams are coming true!!!!

    • Hi, I suggest procare, we went thru them and got results in 4 months. They never leave u in the dark. What you would need to do is call them and set up a consultation meeting. After this meeting you will be well informed about what’s next, like I say they are on the ball. Let me know how it goes, It goes so quick it’ll leave your head spinning (in a good way) 🙂

      • When I read your blog I thought that sounds just like Eloise of Procare! Congratulations on your adoption, Hayden is very cute. Our daughter turned 5 in April, we got her when she was a month old and it has been the most amazing experience ever.

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